Mary, Be with Me Now
By Lisa Tozzi
Reflecting on my relationship with Mary, it is rather hard to put into words or know exactly where to start. After thinking long and hard, I consulted my four-year-old and asked her, "Why do we pray to Mary?" She responded by saying, "Because Mary leads us to Jesus!" There it is; no need to say anything else. While it is so simple for a young child, it can be hard to implement into our adult lives. This is probably why Jesus tells us to have the faith of a child.
Perhaps we overcomplicate things when it comes to Mary. It can be hard to ask for the intercession of someone who was immaculately conceived and literally perfect. There are those in the Protestant community who will tell us that we are worshipping her instead of God. What is important to remember is that Mary directs us to her Son, not to herself.
As I tell you about my relationship with Mary, please understand that it has never been perfect. It’s had its ups and downs, just as life does. My relationship with Mary began in earnest when I was about 25 years old. At that point, I had 5 knee surgeries (I would go on to have 4 more) and I switched careers from athletic trainer to life insurance underwriter. While I missed watching sports, I got to sit at a desk which is what my body needed. I started taking the bus to work, giving me time to start saying the rosary every morning. With Mary by my side, she kept directing me to look for Jesus, which meant being more involved in church. I chaperoned the youth group to NCYC, March for Life, and weekly meetings. High school students were something that I was missing from my athletic training days. I was able to go to World Youth Day in Krakow, Poland, which included time in Rome. Truthfully, I'm not sure why they call these youth events, as I gained so much from them, whether from the speakers or the high school students themselves. I started going to a young adult Bible study and made lifelong friends, all because I started asking Mary to help me follow God's will for my life.
November of 2024 was a rough one for me. My mom was dealing with treatments for breast cancer, I had to schedule my four-year-old for invasive medical testing, and at almost 11 weeks pregnant, I needed a D&C. I was devastated and just overwhelmed. I would love to sit here and tell you that I prayed to God and totally accepted this, but, of course, I didn't. For a long while my prayer life consisted of, "Mary, please be a mother to me now."
She answered me as only a mother can. She knew I needed to have a conversation with Jesus and that I was being stubborn and didn't want to talk to Him. So she showed me Him in others. I saw Him in the usher at church, who held the door as I left Mass crying; in a friend, who let me know that she was praying for us; in another friend, who at the time, had no idea and just made sure to say hi; when we were experiencing financial burden, a family member sent us a DoorDash gift card; in the MOM's group at St. Max, as they cried and prayed with me. In all of these little moments, Mary showed me that Jesus never left me, despite my anger. He is with me always.
At the beginning of Advent, St. Max had a penance service, and we decided to go as family. When we arrived, the lines were long, and my 3- & 4-year-olds were being 'active' children. I told my husband, “You and our oldest can go to confession; I'll come back another time.” He, of course, declined. Mary was there telling me, “You need to talk to my Son.” It was the best confession that I had had in a long time. I won't go into full details, but when the Church says that the priest is persona Christi, they are 100% correct.
My four-year-old is factual when it comes to the importance of Marian intercession; she does lead us to Jesus. Mary is the perfect mediator. She loves us as a mother and only wants us to follow her Son. Praying to Mary doesn't have to be a rosary--maybe it’s a decade, or saying "Mary be with me now.” In Mary, we have someone on our side who will help open our eyes to the will of the Father.